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I have to stop and remind myself of some things in this season of fundraising…
Fundraising is not an obstacle. It is a means to growth, it is a refinery of character, it is a place where God forges radical faith and hope.
It is what reminds me to not be independent, it is a symbol of community.
It is not a downgrade in power, but an invitation to bring others into the sweeping current of God’s Kingdom that I have the privelege to experience.
It is not begging for money, but is receiving God’s provision. It is a message of hope to those that partner with me, not a message of burden.
It is not dependent on the health of the economy, but rests solely on God’s identity as Jehovah Jireh, the God who provides.
Keep my heart dependent on You, as I am often fall easily into hopelessness. Give me faith and increase my faith to see you provide for me. Help me remember that I am Your son, who is loved by You, and that You never lead me into places where you will forget me.
amen.
It troubles me how much intelligent conversation is used as a distraction from loving others. It’s all TALK. Do we veer close to the edge where we have philosophized about love so much that we have forgotten how to actually do so? I am not against intellectualizing. I’m just scared that in our attempts to not be lemmings that walk off cliffs, we’ve become apathetic and just sat there without budging… waiting for ourselves to think ourselves out of our problems.
I’m so tired of people who feel that thinking will solve their problems. I spent 4 years relying on my thought and my ability to sound eloquent expressing that thought… and found myself in this intellectual ivory tower (more like a glass and concrete library in the shape of a tree) that was high out of reach from relevancy.
I’ve seen long conversations go full circle. And it’s troubling to see how cyclic they can become. It’s part of our scientific process that was born out of a disillusion with faith during the enlightenment… but what happens when you’ve become disillusioned with a disillusion?
I know people who suspect I’ve totally abandoned rationality. I haven’t. It’s just that at the end of it all… the deepest and most mysterious truths are the simplest. And they should be kept that way. there’s no breaking them down…faith. hope. love. i’ve tried. Breaking them down just leaves them… torn apart, without power. Understood, but turned into the latest science experiment, not something that changes and guides me at a deep level.
I don’t want to be guided by my own analysis. That just leaves me within a yuppy heaven (or hell)- in smoky independently owned coffee shops sipping from a cup and trying to look as emo as possible. There’s something deeper. There’s something beyond my ability to analyze. my analysis, intellectualism and philosifization can be the springboard into it, but it is not the ends.
